Semi-retirement

Well hello.

Not sure who all still lurks around here anymore these days...

This blog has always happened in fits and starts, which was just fine while I was winding my way through seminary and while blogging and social media were all new, exciting, trendy ventures.

But this particular space has become a bit of a challenge for me! It started as a purely personal blog, where I talked about my own life, shared stories and pictures from family gatherings and holidays, wrote a bunch of posts about mundane things like knitting and baseball-watching. The mundane stuff meandered over into Facebook statuses and tweets, and honestly, much of that has just fallen away altogether.

I used this space as a place to dump sermons and musings on ministry, and I still like putting those things out there for people to read, but I've started to think that this is no longer the best space for them.

So, I think it is time to make official what has been happening unofficially around here: to place this blog into semi-retirement.

Instead, I've started focusing my writing a bit, and portioning it out. So never fear! I'm still writing, just in different places:

Keeping the Season - a blog that I've kept for a few years now, mainly a collection of art, poetry, music, and musings on the liturgical seasons, which started as a way to collect my Advent post-a-day projects. This is also where I've been posting my sermons.

The Holy Imagination - a new blog that I've started, focused more intently on matters of spirituality, faith, ministry, and seeing God in the wider world.

Laughing With Sarah - this is my hidden-turned-semi-public blog on all things infertility, pregnancy, and baby-related.

Those three are more than enough venues for keeping up with me. Art, spirituality, and family. The three big emphases in my life. Feel free to follow me around in those ventures!

And who knows whether this space will come alive again - it certainly might! But until then, it is time to go quiet around here, intentionally, that other pieces of writing and creativity might have room to grow.

Keeping Advent

It's time again for my annual spiritual practice of blogging each day of Advent; not often my own words, but the words and poems and music and artwork and thoughts of others. Advent is a nice time to collect beautiful things, and I've been doing this for a few years running now. This year, though, I'm doing all of my Advent blogging over at my other blog, "Keeping the Season," where I've tried to collect said artwork/poetry/etc. throughout the year, reflecting on the seasons of the church. This blog actually grew out of my Advent practice. So if you want a daily piece of Advent-related beauty, be sure to check in over there every day from now until Christmas...and beyond! :)

Keeping the Season

During this past Advent season, I decided to start a new blog. In previous years, I have used this particular blog space for all sorts of things. Writings, ramblings, sharing personal pictures and stories, sharing pictures and stories and poems and artwork from others...

And in Advent, I decided that it might be nice to collect all of my church-season blog posts in one place. So I started a dedicated blog for poetry, music, pictures, and reflections on the liturgical season. It's called Keeping the Season.

In Advent, I cross-posted those items there and here, but I'm thinking that for Lent, I'll post liturgical season sorts of reflections over there, and other stuff over here (personal stuff, sermons, general thoughts and writings and rantings, etc.) Also, as of yesterday evening, I finally finished transferring over all of the rest of these similar posts from Advent, Christmas, Lent, and Holy Week from years past, so they are now all in one place.

I've put a link to Keeping the Season in the sidebar, so you can always see what's going on in that space. I posted over there yesterday, and am planning to post again today, with further reflections on Ash Wednesday.

Keeping Advent, day twenty-three

One drawback of any one-post-every-day venture is that things move very quickly. Everything you post is quickly buried under the next days' posts and there isn't much time to sit with any one idea. So instead of filling today with another new thing, I would rather revisit a handful of my favorite posts from my "Keeping Advent" series.

Day five: I really like the picture that I found for this post. It is as if the bird were the Spirit that has come upon the Messiah. Flickr is an amazingly fun place to visit and often rewards you with images like this.

Day six: This choral piece is new to me this year. The St. Olaf Choir sang it at Christmasfest earlier this month, and it was stunning. I am always amazed at the power of music.

Day nine: Hands-down, my favorite post of this entire series. I found both the picture and the "Eating batter" post on the same day, quite by accident. But the message is so spot-on when we think about what it means to live in the season of Advent and to live entire lives of Advent.

Day eleven: I'm a little proud to have taken the picture that is a part of this post (I get lucky shots like this on occasion), but I absolutely love Rowan Williams, and this poem speaks to my heart in this season.

Day twenty: We offered a Longest Night worship service for the congregation over this past weekend (just shy of the actual longest night), which was a time for people whose souls were most vulnerable to gather in order to take most seriously the darkness of Advent and look toward the light of Christ. The service was incredibly meaningful - praying for all manner of griefs and losses in our lives, and trusting God as the source of healing and peace - and I feel that it was a time and space that most truly reflected what Advent is all about.

Are there other posts this season that have been particularly interesting or meaningful to you?

Keeping Advent, day two

One of the most beautiful and thought-provoking blogs I follow during Advent is Jan Richardson's The Advent Door. It is a separate blog that she keeps during the Advent season, apart from her regular blog, The Painted Prayerbook. Both her visual art pieces and her reflections are inviting, spiritually moving, and quietly profound. She is one of my favorite people to read in preparation for writing sermons. Here are some of her thoughts for the first Sunday in Advent:

If we stay awake; if we open our eyes in the midst of our life, with all of its wildness and wonders, then we will see: something is coming. Drawing closer. Stealing home.

How will you stay awake in this season? What do you long for the weeks ahead to look like? How might you find God’s response to those longings in the rhythm of your life, in the midst of your days?

Whatever the pace of your life in this season, may wonders attend you. (Advent 1: Where Advent Begins, 2010)

And here are some moving words for the second Sunday in Advent:

As [John] the Baptist strides into the Advent landscape, he reminds us that there is much that connects this season with the season of Lent, with its images of wilderness and its invitation to let go of what hinders us from God. John’s presence, so early in the Advent lectionary, calls us to see that beneath the twinkle lights and trimmings that permeate these pre-Christmas days, there is a terrain more spare and elemental: a landscape in which we learn to turn away from what distracts us so that we can welcome the one for whom we are waiting. This turning is at the heart of John’s message to his hearers: “Repent,” he calls out, “for the kingdom of heaven has come near.” (Advent 2: A Road Runs Through It, 2010)

I encourage you to visit her websites, to read her reflections, and to browse her stunning artwork. I hope that you find her to be as meaningful as I do!

Falling behind

It's probably a good thing that life gets in the way of blogging. There's something to be lifted up about living life rather than trying to document it, and about having live and lively discussion rather than focusing on stimulating virtual conversation.

But yes, I've fallen behind my NaBloPoMo goal. Last year, I somehow managed to squeak out a post for every day of November. This year, well, that ship has already sailed. However, as I look at things, the tagline of NaBloPoMo is "30 Posts in 30 Days." Even if I can't succeed at posting every day, at least I can have as my goal a total of 30 posts, even if it means doubling up on some days.

For instance, this little explanation and apology and admittance of defeat is really a throwaway post. I can easily post a second time today without feeling like I'm overwhelming my readers (all 2 or so of them...).

So this is my new plan: live up to the 30 posts in 30 days goal, and feel good about it!

Cyber navel-gazing

I must begin with a question: is "navel-gazing" really as common of an expression as I think it is? I used it in a staff meeting last week and Katie looked at me like I was bonkers. Apparently she's never heard it before. I thought it was a pretty well-known expression. Anyway, I digress.

For a second year in a row, I have decided to participate in National Blog Posting Month (the November version). You may have noticed the button in my sidebar (or not, if you're reading this on Facebook or via RSS).

I figure that once a year it's worth it to try to get back in a habit of posting things around here other than sermons. And I figure that if I consider writing to be one of my soul-nourishing, mind-soothing, enjoyable hobbies...then perhaps I should actually make an effort to DO it, instead of letting it fall by the wayside when life is busy.

Yes, this is a pretty lame post. Yes, I'm blogging about blogging. Yes, it's a bit of cyber navel-gazing. But I figure that if I'm churning out 30 posts in 30 days, at least one of them gets to be a little obnoxious like this. :)

Breaking the silence!

Yes. Indeed. It has been a while since I wrote anything here. And by "wrote anything," I mean posted something resembling an actual blog post, instead of a sermon or a newsletter article or a reflection for Holy Week.

It's been quiet for many reasons. Quiet because I'm unbelievably busy (in a good way). Tomorrow marks my one-year anniversary at St. Timothy. I have survived a program year, my first Christmas season, my first Holy Week, my first round of teaching confirmation and planning high school events and activities. In the midst of all of this, sometimes it is hard to have anything interesting to say in a blog post, or, frankly, over dinner. Sometimes it's hard to detach myself from the everyday details of church work and find something else to talk about. And many of those details aren't necessarily appropriate for blog posts. There are plenty of things that happen in a given week would never be appropriate to discuss somewhere as public as a blog on the internet. And then, on top of all of this, there's this pesky little thing called "Facebook" and this little fad called "Twitter," which means that plenty of everyday details and thoughts get communicated in places other than this blog.

But I'm breaking the silence today - hoping to make an effort to start writing here again, in addition to continuing to post my sermons and other more "formal" writings. I like having a space to air my thoughts on the world.

Things to Click

Links that caught my attention yesterday:

For those of us who can't seem to keep our homes/apartments/desks/etc. organized and uncluttered, here's an article revealing Eleven Myths of De-Cluttering.

For those of us who understand that world hunger is a problem, but sometimes have a hard time grasping the reality of hunger here in our own back yard, here's an interesting post from the Economist.com's Democracy in America blog: Putting Food on your Family. As further food for thought (figuratively and literally), from a year ago, here is the blog of a couple who decided to commit to eating on $1 a day: One Dollar Diet Project.

Finally, for those of us who like Christmas, those of us who like reading the results of scientific studies, and those of us who like humor and satire, Malcom Gladwell (author of Blink and The Tipping Point) explains Christmas.

Hello, bed. I've missed you.

So here's the thing. I got back from the confirmation retreat around 3 today. It was an EXCELLENT retreat, and there's much to be said about it. But not tonight. I want to talk about the wonderful things that happened, but I am just TOO tired tonight.

I went home, relaxed for about 2 hours, and then went back to church to meet up with the high school group for our crazy bowling night. We had a HUGE turnout, which was awesome. We bowled some regular and some crazy games, which was also awesome. The bowling alley accused our group of trying to cheat them out of pizza...that was NOT awesome...and NOT true. But apart from that, a great night with an amazing group of high schoolers!

I'm blessed! I spent this weekend with a combined 60+ St. Timothy youth of a variety of ages. They all make me so happy. I'm at this church, in this call for a distinct reason. It's amazing.

Even when I'm tired. And grumpy. And physically exhausted. And dreading some of my Monday morning office tasks. Despite all of that, I love my job. And more than that, I love the kids I work with!

Now, it is beyond bedtime. There are more stories to tell from this weekend, but not until tomorrow. If you're craving substance, check out yesterday's guest post from my hubby. Good stuff there.

NaBloPoMo

>Not that anyone much reads my blog (though if you're on Facebook, all of my posts show up as notes - you can read them there if it's easier!)...

But I love writing, and always have, and probably always will. Even if it's more sermons and blog posts than short stories these days, I'm still a writer at heart. So I'm going to try this out: NaBloPoMo. Why not? It could be fun! Or a disaster...we'll just have to wait and see. :)

Free time? Huh?

Turns out that this whole pastor thing keeps me busy.

And it also turns out that the things that occupy my brain - the things on my mind that I would ordinarily blog about - can be summed up in the following sentence: I wish that people would engage ideas and issues (even controversial ones) in the spirit of conversation rather than contention.

Turns out that I write about this theme quite often around here. So instead of boring you with continued rants about people-behaving-badly, I do things like ignore my blog for a full month.

But I'm still here, I promise.

Freshening Up

It is amazing that March is so busy for me that the busy-ness actually spilled backwards into the end of February! There is lots to say and nothing to say. First call things are moving along nicely, as far as I can tell. Slowly, but nicely. Hopefully I'll be able to say more over the next few weeks.

Work is work - still loving it here, and incredibly sad when I think about leaving, even though when I leave, it will be to pursue the vocation I've been waiting and working toward for the past five and a half years (yikes, that's a long time!). Also, when I leave here, it will mean that I've accepted a call, which will likely be in the suburbs, so leaving this job also means leaving the city, which means moving and all of the "joys" that go with it....packing, unpacking, learning a new place, finding new grocery stores and restaurants and shortcuts across town. But it will also mean moving into a bigger place (it's about time), moving with a better sense of permanence, and (finally) beginning to settle down, put down some roots, and regain a sense of stability and habit. I think Matt and I can then really begin to feel like a family (a little two-person-plus-cat family for now, but kids someday), as opposed to transient students.

Anyway, it is starting to feel like spring these days. Not the weather yet, but the daylight and the overwhelming sense that change and renewal are in the air. We had friends visiting over the weekend, and so we did a substantial bout of spring cleaning, I'm trading in my winter boots for rain boots and flip-flops, and I've freshened up my blog design a bit.

Despite lingering cold weather, does anyone else out there feel as if spring is (just about) in the air?

Caving In.

I held out for as long as I could. But alas, it's time for me to join in this whole "25 things" meme. But I refuse to tag anyone, so there! (I have to exercise at least a little bit of rebellion, here!)

1. I've come to love my morning commute. I like the little world I get to create for myself on the bus every morning, whether I listen to music or read or knit. There are many days that I actually wish for slow traffic on Lake Shore Drive so that I can stay in that little world for longer before I have to be productive at work.

2. I live a rather plain life these days...and I'm more than okay with that. I think that people underestimate the joy of being just a bit boring.

3. I love black coffee, and I'd much rather drink too-strong or even burnt coffee than watery, weak coffee. However, these days, I'm enamored with putting just a dab of half-and-half in my coffee.

4. I have at least 10 friends and acquaintances who are pregnant right now, and at least another 10 who have had babies over the last year. It's ridiculous.

5. I'm making this list in order to put off calling a hotel sales rep to fix some details for an upcoming conference that I'm helping to plan. I hate hate hate making phone calls to strangers. I even hate calling to order pizza.

6. I'm a bit obsessed with knitting Scandinavian-motif hats these days, and am vaguely considering making them to sell.

7. The 100-Calorie Pack Oreo Thin Crisps are REALLY good. I eat them not because of the calorie content, but because they are tasty.

8. I've been waiting and working toward being a pastor for 5+ years, but now that I'm close to actually being one, I'm terrified.

9. I consider arrogance and the inability to listen to be two of the most unattractive qualities a person could possess.

10. I always make grandiose plans to clean the apartment, cook good food, and enjoy a smattering of my favorite hobbies (knitting, piano playing, reading, video games) on Saturdays. Instead, I end up sleeping later than I intend to and then sitting around watching the Food Network all afternoon.

11. I waste a lot of time on the internet, but I try (often unsuccessfully) to waste it on meaningful things like thoughtful/edifying blogs, news sources, and sites that encourage my creativity.

12. I love Guitar Hero.

13. Even though lots of other people do it, I can't bring myself to go running in my neighborhood when it's dark, no matter how well-lit the street. It still seems dangerous to me.

14. I blame my husband for the fact that I am antsy for the start of the baseball season. I never would have guessed that I'd actually get excited for any sport, especially baseball.

15. I love citrus scents. I hate vanilla-scented things.

16. I am in serious need of a haircut.

17. I get flustered when I have too many good options. For instance, if I go grocery shopping and come home with a wide array of interesting food, I get overwhelmed thinking about what to cook/eat first.

18. I have two songs stuck in my head right now: the third movement of Leonard Bernstein's "Chichester Psalms," and "Take Me Out" by Franz Ferdinand. The combination is admittedly strange.

19. I get anxious when I think too hard about the frailty of human life.

20. I can wax existential at the drop of a hat. And I can turn any circumstance into a deep analogy about the human existence. It makes for good sermons and blog posts, but gets tiresome on an everyday basis.

21. I am learning to accept the fact that I can be a total flake sometimes.

22. Matt and I can get into passionate debates about the TV show The West Wing. We debate about where we think the plot is going (we own all 7 seasons, are working our way through them for the first time, and are currently just past halfway through season 6). We debate about the quality of the writing (pre- and post-Sorkin). We debate about the characters' motivations and expectations. We debate the show in light of Aaron Sorkin's other work. I think that sometimes we forget that it's just a TV show and not real life....

23. These days, I do nearly all of my grocery shopping at Trader Joe's, because I can stop there on my way home from work. I love Trader Joe's.

24. I get cranky when my friends don't post new and interesting content on facebook as often as I'd like, even though I myself rarely post new and interesting content.

25. In general, I consider myself to be happier than most people. I'm not sure if this means that I'm an optimist or just naive.

Intellectual Honesty

In high school English class, while we were learning to write good papers - coherent, convincing, well-structured works - I remember one piece of advice that seemed backwards and silly when first presented: acknowledge the strengths of the opposing opinion/the weaknesses of your opinion, and then go on to further your claim, even in light of its holes. I didn't appreciate this wisdom fully until seminary, when I was trying to write papers on topics that church fathers and academics and professional theologians had been writing on for years and years and years. It is difficult to write papers that critique or oppose ideas presented by major players in the academic/theological world, even if you happen to have a major theologian on your side while doing so! And so it became important to me not only to understand my side of a given issue, but also appreciate the worth of the person or thought or ideology against which I was arguing. It not only helped me craft my argument and craft my paper, but it also gave me credibility.

I was pleased to come across the following post a few weeks ago, which confirmed everything that my high school English teachers had taught me, and which has particular resonance with me when thinking about either politics or blog posts:

The 10 Signs of Intellectual Honesty
When it comes to just about any topic, it seems as if the public discourse on the internet is dominated by rhetoric and propaganda. People are either selling products or ideology. In fact, just because someone may come across as calm and knowledgeable does not mean you should let your guard down and trust what they say. What you need to look for is a track record of intellectual honesty. Let me therefore propose 10 signs of intellectual honesty.
1. Do not overstate the power of your argument. One’s sense of conviction should be in proportion to the level of clear evidence assessable by most. If someone portrays their opponents as being either stupid or dishonest for disagreeing, intellectual dishonesty is probably in play. Intellectual honesty is most often associated with humility, not arrogance.
2. Show a willingness to publicly acknowledge that reasonable alternative viewpoints exist. The alternative views do not have to be treated as equally valid or powerful, but rarely is it the case that one and only one viewpoint has a complete monopoly on reason and evidence.
3. Be willing to publicly acknowledge and question one’s own assumptions and biases. All of us rely on assumptions when applying our world view to make sense of the data about the world. And all of us bring various biases to the table.
4. Be willing to publicly acknowledge where your argument is weak. Almost all arguments have weak spots, but those who are trying to sell an ideology will have great difficulty with this point and would rather obscure or downplay any weak points.
5. Be willing to publicly acknowledge when you are wrong. Those selling an ideology likewise have great difficulty admitting to being wrong, as this undercuts the rhetoric and image that is being sold. You get small points for admitting to being wrong on trivial matters and big points for admitting to being wrong on substantive points. You lose big points for failing to admit being wrong on something trivial.
6. Demonstrate consistency. A clear sign of intellectual dishonesty is when someone extensively relies on double standards. Typically, an excessively high standard is applied to the perceived opponent(s), while a very low standard is applied to the ideologues’ allies.
7. Address the argument instead of attacking the person making the argument. Ad hominem arguments are a clear sign of intellectual dishonesty. However, often times, the dishonesty is more subtle. For example, someone might make a token effort at debunking an argument and then turn significant attention to the person making the argument, relying on stereotypes, guilt-by-association, and innocent-sounding gotcha questions.
8. When addressing an argument, do not misrepresent it. A common tactic of the intellectually dishonest is to portray their opponent’s argument in straw man terms. In politics, this is called spin. Typically, such tactics eschew quoting the person in context, but instead rely heavily on out-of-context quotes, paraphrasing and impression. When addressing an argument, one should shows signs of having made a serious effort to first understand the argument and then accurately represent it in its strongest form.
9. Show a commitment to critical thinking. ‘Nuff said.
10. Be willing to publicly acknowledge when a point or criticism is good. If someone is unable or unwilling to admit when their opponent raises a good point or makes a good criticism, it demonstrates an unwillingness to participate in the give-and-take that characterizes an honest exchange.
While no one is perfect, and even those who strive for intellectual honesty can have a bad day, simply be on the look out for how many and how often these criteria apply to someone. In the arena of public discourse, it is not intelligence or knowledge that matters most – it is whether you can trust the intelligence or knowledge of another. After all, intelligence and knowledge can sometimes be the best tools of an intellectually dishonest approach.
- Mike Gene

It's no secret that I am particularly sensitive about dialogue and about "playing fair" in conversation. Along with that, I get frustrated by politicians and bloggers who present themselves with an air of authority but who refuse to present their thoughts and opinions in an evenhanded way. I understand that blogs and academic papers are very different exercises, and I know that blogs are often spaces simply to voice opinions. But of the blogs I read, most of them are "trying to say something." That is, they want to stimulate intellectual and open dialogue on a variety of topics, ranging from economic policy to theology, from politics to literature. I am sorely disappointed when these blogs exhibit the sorts of intellectual dishonesty against which Mike Gene is speaking. No argument is one-sided, and no one side of an argument has the corner on truth, worth, or "right-ness." We would all do better in our writing - and not just our writing, but our speaking, our debating, and even our conversational dispositions - if we were to strive for a higher standard of intellectual honesty. Because, at its foundations, intellectual honesty is nothing more than respecting the worth of your fellow humans and respecting everyone's right to be thinking beings.

The Queue

Posts to be written in the near future:

1. St. Olaf Homecoming Weekend

2. Teaching Faith not Baggage

3. Evangelical Atheism?

Stay tuned for this and more!

The World Goes On...

My Humorous New Obsession

Friends of mine in the blog-world have recently been enjoying and remarking on the blog Stuff White People Like. It's sarcastic, sardonic, biting satire...I have to admit that I've checked it out in good humor, and am far less impressed than others are with it. I'm not sure if I'm just oversensitive, or if I'm just wired with too much defensiveness in me, or if I have a hard time appreciating satire that really really pushes the line on flat-out insult. But regardless, I appreciate the premise and execution, if not the content.

Yesterday, thanks to a random commenter on Adam's blog, I found a SWPL knock-off blog that has knocked my socks off. It's called Stuff Christians Like, and is a hilarious satire of church/Christian culture. If you have never thought about whether Christians are funny, or whether we appreciate the humor in our own situations, this blog is a great place to start.

Some of my personal favorites:

Saying "In Christian Love" before you punch someone.

The kid who makes out with girls from other youth groups.

Witnessing to people who don't believe in the Bible using the Bible.

The "pray if you feel led" prayer.

The Double Sermon.

Giving open flames to kids on Christmas Eve.

The G(DTR).

Committees on Committees about Committees.

I'm Likely to Post at Least 3 Times Today

And to kick things off, a book meme that I've looked at but not yet done. And for what it's worth, I'm ignoring rule #5. Yeah, I'm just that rebellious...

1. Pick up the nearest book (of at least 123 pages).
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five other people.


Here's what I've come up with from Marva Dawn's book, A Royal "Waste" of Time: The Splendor of Worshiping God and Being Church for the World:

No passage in the Scriptures says, "Worship the Lord to attract the unbeliever." Rather, in countless texts we are commanded, invited, urged, wooed to worship the Trinity because God is worthy of our praise. As stated at the beginning of this chapter, worship can actually be done only by those who recognize that worthiness. Furthermore, the worship service is part of the entire education process of the Christian community by which God's people are equipped to introduce others to his worthiness.

Indeed, something appropriate for me to think about on a snowy February afternoon while I'm working on a sermon for Wednesday mid-week Lenten worship and while I'm waiting to hear back from PhD programs in liturgy and theology.

Guest Blogging!

I was invited to write a post for Adam's blog, pomomusings, on the topic of the kingdom of God. It's a little intimidating to put your theology out there for many to see, but I'm excited to be a part of the conversation. Thanks, Adam! You can find my post here.